Why Are Christians So Angry?

I couldn’t believe the comments that people posted!

I used to write more at gavinadams.com. I took a blogging sabbatical while I completed my doctorate. I finished my thesis project in November and decided to revisit my blog. What I saw was a shocking reminder.

Christians are really angry.

My lack of posting over the past two years didn’t seem to curtail people commenting on previous posts. Wow! I’m glad I have thick skin!

In the comments, I was called a heretic. I believe one person questioned my salvation and even suggested I prayed to Satan. It was suggested that I was ruining God’s church. That was flattering because I didn’t realize I had that much influence! I engaged with some of the responders, but I quickly realized the futility of open conversation with angry Christians.

I’m a pastor of a larger church in northwest Atlanta. Our church is a campus location of an even larger group of churches. Dealing with angry people isn’t new. But this version of anger felt, well, angrier.

The blog comments were a reminder of a fact I wish weren’t so true: Christians are a pretty mean bunch. Not all of them, but a lot of them. Sadly, I can understand their anger, because I’m a recovering angry Christian myself. Look inside most church services and you’ll see them — Christians sitting in rows with fake smiles on their face. Ready with an “I’m doing just great, how about you” answer for anyone who dares to ask.

Their life is a mess, but they can’t be honest. They are struggling in their marriage, but nobody can know. They are frustrated in their job, but that must remain a family secret.

Side note: This is why adult church sports leagues are so much worse than any other league. It’s all the pent-up anger that is finally released on the umpire and the opposing team. I’ve seen some of the absolute worst behavior on the church softball fields and basketball courts. Yelling, cheating, name-calling, and even fighting. I may or may not have been a part of it all, too. As I said, I’m in recovery.

So why are Christians so angry?

I’m sure the list is quite long, but here are a few things I’ve had to release in my life. The first two are pretty basic, but the last one needs it’s own post one day.

1. Expectations.

Expectations are breeding grounds for frustrations. Living a life full of expectations will lead anyone to be angry. Mostly because people will consistently underperform against your standard. My expectations almost ended my marriage seven years in. And other's expectations of me have kept me from experiencing God in me. If you want to release some anger and replace it with peace, drop your expectations of others. After all, often what we expect might not even to be expected. Jesus mentioned something like this, using a spec and plank as the illustration.

2. Maintaining an Image.

Again, similar to expectations, maintaining an image is exhausting and unChristian. If you are hiding behind an issue in your life, be honest, be open, and seek help. If there is something in your heart that resists being transparent, pay attention to that tension. Keeping up an image wears you down, and in your exhaustion, anger and frustration are your only outcomes.

3. Tension with Grey.

This one is a biggie! I believe it is the number one reason Christians seem so angry. It splits churches. It can split families. And it can keep us majoring in the minors.

Here is the reality — within the Christian faith, there are only a few absolutes. Don’t post hateful comments just yet — hear me out. For some reason, we have made it our Christian duty to debate, argue, and bicker about every little nuance in Scripture. But in reality, interpretation by definition means there will be disagreements. People are going to see things differently. And, take a deep breath … that’s okay. I doubt any seminary or systematic theology professor would agree with me, because, well, it’s their job to have an opinion and convince others of their opinion.

Outside of monotheism, Jesus as God in a bod, and his subsequent death and resurrection, there isn’t much black and white with God. God is mysterious. Creation is mysterious. I can’t explain dinosaurs, and I don’t mind. It’s in the grey where Christians get so upset. When you believe there is a right and wrong doctrine or theology for EVERY issue, you are bound to end up angry and in many, many arguments. But when you learn to embrace the tension of uncertainty, life becomes more full.

One last thought (for now). This anger isn’t harmless. The absolutely terrible news is that as Christians, we have allowed our disagreements and bickering to be very public, political, and even targeted at the very people we are trying to reach. How insane is that? It’s too bad John isn’t around today to remind us of what Jesus told him in the first century:

34 “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. 35 By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”
– John 13:34–35 (NIV)